Gift Giving

LOVE LANGUAGE #5

Gift Giving: “Gifts is a pretty straightforward love language: You feel loved when people give you ‘visual symbols of love’… It’s not about the monetary value but the symbolic thought behind the item. People with this style recognize and value the gift-giving process: the careful reflection, the deliberate choosing of the object to represent the relationship, and the emotional benefits from receiving the present,” writes Julie Nguyen, a contributor at mbg (mindbodygreen).

Yeah… None of this goes through my head when someone gives me a gift or when I want to give someone a gift. I just immediately get overwhelmed.

Receiving

I stay in survival mode, which I know is unhealthy and something I’m slowly but surely working on. When someone gives me a gift, I feel like there is some ulterior motive or I will have to give them something in return.

My favorite gift to receive, if I had to pick one, is flowers; they have a magical ability to make me feel special, no matter the flower (extra points if they’re yellow roses though).

Giving

I have to be one of the worst gift givers to exist. I always feel embarrassed about and overthink the gifts I give to people.

Honestly, I don’t feel comfortable buying gifts but feel like I’m obligated to because people buy them for me/give them to me.

Sometimes I think I’m going to lose friends because I’m bad at giving gifts, whether it be the actual gift is bad or they physically squirm because they feel weird receiving a gift from me.


When it comes to receiving a gift, I accept and appreciate anything and everything because I never expect anything. However, if I can prevent someone from giving me a gift, I will. I internalize the need to pay someone back for the gift they’ve given me.

Also, I think I’m bad about receiving gifts because I feel guilty for being so bad at giving gifts.

At the end of the day, I am so incredibly awkward with both receiving and giving gifts.

about the author

Jamilah is a college graduate in her early twenties who wants to live and learn and love herself while fighting the anxiety fight.

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