It is officially 2019 in every country!!!! When I woke up yesterday, it was 2018 in America while it was already 2019 in Australia, but now we’re all in a new year!!
I know several people who had the best year of their lives in 2018, and that was not the case for me. However, I have a really great feeling about 2019. I know every day won’t be perfect, but I still think this year will be waaaay better for me personally.
Anyway, with it being a new year, I wrote some new goals for the year. I don’t really do resolutions because when I googled the definition it said a resolution is “a firm decision to do or not do something,” meaning you have to be committed to whatever you decide. Example: a popular resolution every year is to lose weight or get fit, but a goal is almost like a target. Instead of a person saying they want to lose weight as a resolution, that person could say he/she wants to lose 25 pounds before the year ends, which is a goal.
I hope that makes sense. I’m really bad at explaining things, but there is a difference (in my opinion).
Anyway, here are my goals for twenty nineteen.
Be more active on my Instagram story
I know this probably seems ridiculous, but it’s legit. I don’t know if anyone knows this, but fun fact: any time I post something on social media, I get super anxious. Sometimes, I get so scared about what people will think that I’ll get suuuper close to crying; it happens when I upload videos on YouTube too. The anxiety hits a little extra when it comes to Instagram stories, and I don’t know why; I added to mine for the first time today (@its_milahh) and freaked out because I didn’t know what I was doing. People saw it before I added everything I wanted to, and I had a full-blown mental breakdown. I’m challenging myself to be more active on my Insta story to work on my social media anxiety.
Make friends who are down to do anything
This is more for college. I am almost halfway through my college career, and to be honest, I don’t have a single friendship I can say is solid and unwavering. When I started college, I hoped to leave with crazy, hilarious stories and friends I could invite to my future wedding. So far, every friendship I thought was true and solid has ended. I just want to be spontaneous and hang out with really cool people I can lean on for anything while I’m almost 300 miles away from everything I know.
Participate in the hiking club
Another fun fact: I’ve been a part of a hiking club on campus since my second semester of my first year of college, but I have yet to go to any meeting. This year, I strive to not only go to a meeting but to also join them on at least one hike. They don’t have many, so my opportunities are kind of limited. Hiking brings me a sense of peace when my brain is too chaotic to handle, but I don’t do it enough. There’s really no excuse for why I don’t go; I just don’t, but that’s going to change this year. I’ll keep you updated.
Not clean as in doing the dishes and cleaning the bathroom and chores like that. I have a goal of selling and trashing/recycling any unwanted or unneeded items; unneeded items are things I hold onto for absolutely no reason and serve no purpose besides taking up space. I think I’ll do this when I get back to campus; I’ll call it “The Purge.” I think getting rid of a bunch of items that could benefit someone else will give me the clean slate I need.
Collaborate with another small YouTuber
This is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time, and it works out successfully. I’ve tried twice in the past, and both of them didn’t work out. With one, we talked about a concept, but neither videos were made. With the other, I uploaded my video, but she never uploaded hers; in fact, she deleted her account. It would be so fun working with someone else on a video. For me, it wouldn’t be about gaining new subscribers; it would purely be about collaborating with someone else on something fun. My excitement level would be through the roof.
Break habits I developed in 2018
Last year was so bad that I developed some horrible habits to cope with it. The biggest one was pulling out my hair. Every time I was stressed or got stuck in my head (which happens more than it probably should) or felt intense emotion as a reaction to a negative event, I would start pulling my hair out. Now, I have little bald spots throughout my hair, but since my hair is so thick, you can’t really see them. Also, I started licking off my chapstick and biting my lip as another method to cope, and now I have dark spots on my lips. Towards the end of last year, my lips started bleeding a lot; it was almost like a nosebleed but coming from my lip. My goal in 2019 is to find another, better method to cope with everything and to break the aforementioned habits.
Find a great photographer
This is another one that’s more for college. When I’m in Nashville, I know a couple of people I could call on to do a photo shoot with, but the same can’t be said for when I’m on campus. I’m not sure if I love modeling, but I like having professional pictures taken of me while I’m being myself (not professional pictures like Jostens or Portrait Innovations; independent photographers). I think it would be really fun, and I’d love to have more professional pictures on this site.
Improve the quality of my videos
I don’t mean quality as in the content I’m making. I mean quality as in the actual camera. Right now, for my main channel, I use a Canon Rebel t3i, and for my vlogs, I use a cheap camera that I got for thirty dollars and takes old iPhone quality videos, which is why I start every vlog with, “Welcome to another high-quality vlog filmed on a low-quality camera.” I would love to upgrade both cameras this year.
Start writing another book
I am so not proud of my first book; it is absolute trash, and to anyone I gave it to, you can recycle it. I won’t be offended. To anyone who actually paid for it, I’m sorry. Anyway, this year, I want to start writing another book, which won’t be fiction, and I already have the concept for it.
Balance everything better
School and not dying because of self error are kind of priority (among other things). When I’m on campus, I don’t balance these and blogging and YouTube well. If I focus on one for a week, the other three categories start to slack, which is not good for the school and self-care categories. This year, I want to balance my weeks better to where I am giving the necessary attention to all four categories in the course of one week. It’ll improve my girl bossness (I know that’s not a word, but you know what I mean).
Invest in my appearance
For someone who loves fashion so much, I don’t own many high-quality items. I figured out my style a few months ago; now I just need to get items that don’t tear easily and match my style to a T. My goal is to purchase clothing items that really suite me, can survive more than two washes and me accidentally drying them wrong, and will last more than a month. Also, I want to invest in my hair more. Now that I’m going natural, I need to start investing in items that make it look good and make it easier to get through the thickness. Lastly, I need to invest in some amazing shaving cream, razors, and body scrub that does wonders for the skin.
Post more than one blog post a week
This isn’t because every book and website about blogging says to upload loads of content a week to get noticed and get a lot of money and all that jazz. I just simply have a lot I want to write about and share that uploading once a week just doesn’t do it for me anymore. The only thing that could mess this up is school, but it all goes back to balancing everything better.
If you didn’t know, I am a Christian, and last year, I started taking my relationship to God seriously. This year, I want to continue to improve that relationship and feed my spirit the food it needs. There’s so much to learn and understand.