I moved to North Carolina and started a new job–that doesn’t feel like a job, in a good way–two months ago.

It started when I was going through LinkedIn and applied for every job I thought I was semi-qualified for under the search terms “interior design assistant” and “graphic design assistant.” Out of the many jobs I applied for, I only got one interview and thought I butchered it. Well, it turns out I didn’t, so I kind of documented one of the most chaotic months of my life.

This was also during the time of my self-care trip to Cincinnati and getting my wisdom teeth out.

The first month in North Carolina was really hard. I hated sitting in an empty apartment and could only overthink about the tense arguments I had with my grandparents. Well, they were never really arguments but carried the same intensity as arguments.

My grandparents are like my parents, so I understand and understood their worry. However, they only know a part of me, but all of me has yearned for freedom for years–a freedom I couldn’t obtain in Tennessee, not even when I went east for college.

I am learning and finding that freedom in North Carolina. I still have mild depressive moments as a result of homesickness, but I can feel myself falling in love with North Carolina and the ability to exist without worry, which is kind of why I started this blog; I wanted to exist and be me without worry… or fear.

I think a… unique (to say the least)… friendship has played a part in me quickly gaining comfort in this new place.

Even without him, I feel hopeful and excited, and to quote pretty much everyone who knew me on the struggle bus, “This change is good for me.”