It’s been almost six months since I shared the random, intrusive thoughts I keep from my friends.

Well, in those six months, I’ve had many more intrusive thoughts. I would get overwhelmed in deciding who to blurt a thought out to and would start overthinking about how every friend would respond.

Also in that time frame, I’ve lost and gained friends, which would lead to me wishing I had blurted the intrusive thought when it entered my brain. It wouldn’t matter if I said whatever I said in front of the people who stopped sticking around, right?

Instead of being completely random, I wrote down every random thought I stopped myself from texting or whispering to someone, just like last time.

Welcome to another look inside my brain:

• I think one of the best things about someone as non-tech savvy as me is I never know who is following or liking. I can just write, post, and be done.
• How did a nation that’s supposed to be united become so divided?
• Literally can’t stop overthinking about how I called my boss’ husband her boyfriend.
• Remember when I wasn’t blind and could wear any pair of cool sunglasses I wanted? An iconic era.
• So when does Apple plan on discontinuing Air tags?
• I just feel like it should be illegal to send your employees outside when there’s a heat advisory.
• I spent a majority of my REM sleep dreaming that I was pregnant, and even though I couldn’t quite figure out how (maybe I did follow through with the idea of insemination), I was sad when I woke up and realized I won’t experience that any time soon.
• I can’t control people; I need to stop thinking I can.
• I’ve made the fatal error of talking about my problems and hardships with people I haven’t yet formed genuine connections with. Help.
• Teachers need paid summers off. Period.
• I’ve realized I’m only blunt around the people I’m comfortable with.
• How do I make a name for myself when the economy is literally falling apart (again)?
• I just find it interesting that the person who consistently talks about not having money is the same person who consistently talks about the next ten purchases they will make.
• Sometimes the best people make the worst decisions.
• I am done falling for guys who are emotionally unavailable; I can’t be the only one who’s vulnerable.
• I can’t decide which environment is worse to work in: toxic momsplaining or toxic mansplaining.
• Why are the good men gay? (I’m looking at you Heartstopper)
• Sometimes my brain gets the multiverse and metaverse mixed up.
• Why can’t I keep my big mouth shut? I feel like people would stop randomly shutting down on me if I just stopped speaking so much and feeling so intensely. But also, why must I change who I am for the pleasure of other people? I hate when my brain decides to randomly play tug-o-war.
• Threaten me with surgery, and I’ll definitely listen.
• Somewhere between “screw all men” and “tell me you love me already.”
• Why does my period make my bathroom look like there’s been a murder?
• I’m really bad about making impulse decisions when I start to freak out, and I recognize that.
• Why can’t progress be linear?
• Most people change their hair when they get their hearts broken; I changed job locations.
• Is it me being a picky eater or is it my body rejecting a lot of foods?
• I feel like the world would be in a much better place if men just talked about their feelings.
• I love how people look at me and automatically feel the need to tell me I’m innocent.
• Last night, I had a dream that I was in a polyamorous marriage for money, and the day after the wedding, I felt guilty because I was still pining after someone who used to hold a special place in my heart.
• Today I learned how to both look and use a ratchet at the same time.
• The more I make someone else’s baby smile, the more I want one; insemination is looking better and better with each month that passes.
• Why am I so desperate to have someone in my life who doesn’t want to be there?

So to sum it up, my brain for the past six months has mostly consisted of: work, babies, love, and indecisiveness.